February 22nd, 2004

journies begin with the first step

I told you!

okay, okay, after reading mr. royko's journal from a few days past, I was semi interested in seeing what the Match.com attraction test would tell me. So I waded through it, trying to ignore the test's transparenceness at times, and then read through the results. Now I don't know if my mind and eyes have been changed by this relationship or what, but every damn test result matchs my boyfriend. The test says I want attractive, but not conveniently attractive men, who have a bigger bear like look with hairy chests and (here's that damn word again) mesometomorphic faces, as well as facial hair and partial to completely bald men between the ages of 30-45. Every damn one! Man, I heard that once you are in love, it seems like you see your lover everywhere, but for it to warp my attractiveness test results in such a manner is insane! I wonder what it would have said if I took this test four years ago when I was single. Quite strange, don't you think? But overall, that's ok, because if I find my man to be 100% attractive to me, than that is all that matters. And he is, he is so sexy to me, no matter what others may see. There's something so strong, protective, and yet cuddly about him. Even when he tries to pull away from my clingy affection at times , I still can't resist giving him all the love that I can. I know he needs it, and even though he denies it, I know that he wants it. I feel our relationship has changed him, not from his essential self, but has changed him in the way that he is able to love. There's something so great about that, seeing someone open up.